Heaven On Earth Ch. 05. There you are, a first time for everything.
Heaven on Earth: Chapter 5 There You Are
I woke up the next morning fairly early. I had to shower and get out to Brooklyn by 10. My arm was still around Brian’s waist when I woke up. I listened to the gentle sounds of his breathing until my alarm clock went off and I had to let go of him to turn it off. I thought for sure that my movement and the noise would wake him, but he kept on sleeping. I got out of the bed and stepped into the bathroom.
When I was done ten minutes later, I went back into the bedroom where Brian was still sleeping. After putting on some clothes, I returned to the bathroom to brush my teeth and shave. Something looked odd about my neck when I began putting shaving cream on my face. I turned to both sides and noticed that I had hickeys. Not one, but twin hickeys, one on each side. And these weren’t small by any stretch of the imagination. It was pretty funny, actually, but at the same time, I didn’t know how I was going to cover them up when I went to work. It was the middle of July, so it wasn’t exactly turtleneck or scarf weather.
Brian had rolled over onto his back, so I carefully sat on the bed next to him. I’m notorious for studying the way that people look, but I only get a chance when they don’t know that I’m looking. I feel embarrassed when someone finds out that I’m looking. And even though he was my boyfriend, my mother used to tell me that it wasn’t nice to stare. I never noticed before that Brian’s nose curled up a little at the tip. He would have been everyone’s boy next door, but he was too tall for that stereotype. His tan had deepened from the first time that I met him; he was much closer to my own complexion at this time of year. Those perfect lips of his were slightly parted as he slept. I couldn’t resist. I bent down and gave him a gentle good morning kiss. He didn’t respond. The man could sleep through almost anything. I did it again and his eyes slowly fluttered open.
“Hi,” he said.
“Hi, yourself. Were you planning on staying in bed the entire day, Sleeping Beauty?”
He yawned and stretched, sitting up and pulling himself out of the covers a little. “No, I was waiting for a handsome prince to rescue me. Looks like I got my wish.”
I leaned forward and kissed him again. “I’m glad you decided to stay last night. I wish I could stay here, but I’ve got to get to work. Um, I can leave you my key so that you can sleep a little longer and I’ll pick it up from you later.”
“No, that’s okay. I’ll leave when you do. As if I need to sleep any longer. I’ve got to get ready for a seminar later today.”
“I’m sorry I took up so much of your time yetserday. I’ll admit that I got a little selfish.”
“Nonsense. I chose to stay. It’s my fault that I have to make up that work now.”
“Well, the least I can do is make breakfast, the one meal I can cook. Do you want anything? I was going to have scrambled eggs and coffee.”
“That sounds good to me. When do you have to leave?”
I stood up and walked towards the door as I talked. “In about forty minutes, there’s no rush. Did you want one egg or two?”
“Two.”
First, I started on the coffee, adding a lot of beans. It’s not coffee if it’s not strong coffee. I started up the stove and cooked three eggs in a skillet. After I added the butter, salt, and pepper, I realized that I forgot to ask Brian if he liked cheese on his eggs. “Bri!” I shouted. There was no response from the bedroom. I couldn’t leave the eggs, so I decided to leave off the cheese. Better safe than sorry right? Once they were done, I spooned them onto separate plates. I set them out on the table and went into the bedroom wondering why Brian hadn’t responded. He had gone back under the covers and fallen asleep again.
***
As expected, there was a lot of teasing at work about my hickeys. Most of the teens laughed and joked about me landing a wildcat. By the end of the day, I would have been happy never to hear another feline growling sound again. The next week went by very smoothly. Brian and I were able to spend a lot of time together in the evenings. He would finish whatever work he had as early as possible to make time for me. We went out to dinner at a couple of different restaurants, but Erica had been with us both times, so we had never had a real first date. He mentioned that to me, and I told him that the best idea would be to do something after my volunteer work stopped. At least that way I would be less tired in the evenings. We agreed to do something the Saturday after my last day. I was looking forward to it.
That Thursday, there was a whirlwind of things going on. My mother had called and told me that she and Uncle James were coming for a visit on that Sunday. Mom had never responded violently to homosexuality, but while we were kids, she made sure to lecture Maria and me about what was wrong with gay people: how they were sinners and they all had AIDS. It was up to us to teach ourselves differently later in life. I don’t think it was that my mom had anything against gay people, I just don’t think she ever made much of an effort to understand. Still, a dramatic confrontation was the last thing I needed with my mother, so I told Brian to lay low for the few days that they were going to be at my loft.
Not that I had to ask much of Brian anyway. He understood why I wasn’t ready to tell my mother yet. I was feeling so good about our relationship. We hadn’t done anything sexual other than the one blowjob, but I could feel us getting closer and closer. Most nights one of us would stay at the other’s apartment and we would simply cuddle as we went to sleep. That was fine with me. If anything, that one sexual experience broke the ice and allowed us to be more open with each other. Neither of us felt that it absolutely had to be repeated, so we ignored it and got along fine without sex. Building a relationship without sex can be very fulfilling. If it’s a good relationship, and ours was, the ties seem to be even stronger because they aren’t based on going back to our rooms and fucking like rabbits every night. We were connected on more of an emotional level instead of a physical level. I had the feeling it was something that Brian needed after being single for so long.
Like I said, Thursday was absolute chaos. After my mom called, Maria called me to say that Mark was going to be in New York for a couple of nights for a conference early the next week. I obviously knew why she was calling. She wanted Mark to stay with me instead of being at a hotel. Of course, I agreed and I told her that Mom and Uncle James were also going to be staying. We agreed that it was perfect for them all to be here at the same time. Loosely translated that gave my mother more people to divide her attention, which meant fewer headaches for me.
Erica came down that evening to tell me she was going out of town.
“How long are you going to be gone?” I asked.
“It’s only going to be until next Wednesday. My oldest sister had a baby down in Nashville, so I’m gonna help her settle in and adjust for a few days. Our momma will take care of her after that.”
I openly laughed at her. “Momma?”
She slapped me across the back of the head. “I will not tolerate any sass, Mr. Alexander.” I still chuckled. “There is nothing wrong with having a different accent from most everyone else up here. What I was going to ask you is if you could water my plants, check to see if everything is ok up there, that sort of thing.”
“Sure, that won’t be a problem at all.” I thought for a moment before continuing. “But why didn’t you ask Brian to do this for you. I’m sure he knows more about the particular details of your apartment.”
“Brian is lazy, there ain’t nothin’ else to it.” She winked at me and turned to leave. “Sorry to drop by for such a short time, but I need to go ahead and pack so that I can get to the airport straight after work tomorrow. Oh, silly me, I almost forgot.” She tossed me the key to her apartment. “And I expect everything to be in perfect condition by the time I get back.”
“Yes ma’am,” I responded.
“Bye, hun.” “Bye, Erica.”
As I got up to close the door, I could hear Erica’s voice out in the hall saying “Hey.” The person she was talking to walked into my loft and planted a big, wet kiss on my lips.
“Hey, baby.”
“Hey, Brian.” I reached up and pulled back a strand of his hair and smoothed it behind his ear. My fingers ran down from his ear to his face. I ran my finger across his bottom lip. He kissed it, I pulled it away, and kissed his lips again.
“I think we hit a new stage in our relationship,” he said.
“How did you come to that conclusion?”
“You just fixed my hair. I’d say that means we’re getting pretty serious.” He put his hand on my right cheek and I nuzzled my face into his caress. This time, he put his finger on my lip, it was my turn to kiss his finger and then be kissed.
“I won’t disagree with that,” I said with a smile. “What are you up to tonight?”
“I had some laundry to do, and I was wondering if you would like to join me downstairs.”
Brian and I both knew that the laundry room in the basement were not the best in the world, but the one advantage it had over a public laundry room was the privacy. Rarely anyone ever used it, so it was usually empty.
“And what exactly did you have in mind for us to be doing while we wait for the clothes to finish, Mr. Davis?”
“We’re both pretty smart guys. I’m sure we’ll think of something.”
“I’ll go grab my clothes and meet you down there,” I said.
“Great. See ya in a while.”
I went into the bedroom and changed into a pair of running shorts and a fairly tattered t-shirt since I needed to wash the clothes I was wearing. Once I had put the clothes in a sports bag and grabbed the detergent, I took the elevator downstairs to the basement.
Brian was putting the last of his loads into the machine. He looked up when I came in. “Well, fancy meeting you here, stranger.”
I rolled my eyes at his terrible joke, but it was more difficult to ignore the pouty face he made when I ignored him. When he looked at me like that, I couldn’t help but feel guilty. I gave an overly done laughing spell, complete with loud cackles and slaps on my knee.
“Feel better?” I asked.
“Yes,” he said, his face instantly brightening up. I began putting my clothes into the machines. Brian came up behind me and put his arms around my waist. I rocked my hips back and forth while I put the quarters in and started up the loads.
A lot of people have a certain spot on their body that really gets them going. For some, it’s actually the clit or the prostate, but that’s for orgasm. I had a spot where my neck met my back that took me out of this world when it was touched the right way. Brian had found that spot last week when he hugged me and his hand slipped up and brushed it. I almost passed out from the shocks it sent through my body.
That was exactly what Brian was doing to me then. With his arms still around me, he bent down and nipped at my neck. It was only a matter of time before I was moaning in pleasure, pressed up on the metal and clutching the sides of the washer. When Brian licked the back of my neck, that did me in.
“Stop,” I gasped.
“What?”
I freed myself from Brian and moved around to his back, putting him in the position that I was just in. I leaned in and nibbled on his earlobe. Brian had one of those spots, too. He gasped and reached around with one of his hands to stroke my hair as I continued my attack. After a minute or so, he spun around and looked at me lustfully with those cool, blue eyes of his that had turned hot with passion.
“Evan, let’s go back to my place.”
“What about the clothes?” I asked.
“The machines are locked for the next 32 minutes. Look, I’ll set my watch for 27 minutes, that way we have time to get back down here. I need you now, though. Right now.”
So much for the sex free relationship. Well, it’s still possible to build a good relationship with sex. He pulled me by the hand and practically dragged me upstairs. We were alone in the elevator, so we kissed several times before getting to the third floor. God, he had me so hot at this point that I swear I would have gone anywhere with him. Brian fumbled with his key, trying to get the door open, and he almost broke it off the hinges when he finally opened it. The moment we were inside, we grabbed for each other and started kissing again. He took me by the hand and led me towards the bedroom. I didn’t know what he had in mind, but I didn’t care. Brian was the only thing I wanted.
I think I surprised him when I pulled his shirt over his head, but I couldn’t tell because the instant his shirt was off, I started kissing his collar bone and chest. I was rewarded by deep groans that told me I was doing something right. I had never pleased a man before, but I figured that doing some of the things that I liked were bound to get a similar response out of Brian. When I took his left nipple into my mouth, he hissed loudly. After a few minutes of this and giving the other nipple the same treatment, I kissed a trail down his abs to the waist of his jeans. By this point I was kneeling, and as I looked up into Brian’s eyes, the look of excitement on his face was enough to make me explode. My hands were shaking as I unbuttoned his jeans and slid them down his legs. It was fairly obvious that there was a lot of pressure on his briefs. A large wet spot had formed on his underwear. It probably would have been fun to tease him for a while, but to be completely honest, I was so nervous that I didn’t really know what was going on. I practically yanked down his briefs and his cock sprung out and pointed straight at my face. I had never been this close to another man’s penis before. It wasn’t too unlike mine. His was a little shorter and a little thinner, but I was sure that it was definitely enough for me to handle. I looked up at him again, and he just smiled down at me.
He must have known how nervous I was because he said, “Just don’t use your teeth. You’ll be fine, baby.”
I used my lips to cover my teeth as I took the head into my mouth. It wasn’t bad. I pushed myself forward a little more and took about half of his length into my mouth before I gagged a little and pulled back. Brian put his hand on the back of my head and slowly guided me up and down the shaft. Based on blowjobs that I had received, I used my tongue to flick and massage him. I could tell it was good for him, but I wanted to bring him as much pleasure as he brought me. I moved myself forward again, this time taking more of him into my mouth and controlling my gag reflex. I kept sucking on him, moving up and down, up and down. Once I felt the head hit the back of my throat, I swallowed and took the rest of him into me. Both of us moaned, and my moaning caused my muscles to close in around his dick, making him moan even louder. My hands were around his back, caressing and stroking his ass as I steadied myself. Before long, I had to pull back a little and simply keep sucking on him. That must have been fine with Brian because soon he tapped my shoulder.
“Evan, I’m gonna cum. Pull off.”
I didn’t want to pull off. I wanted all of him. I kept licking and sucking until he cried out and shot a giant load in my mouth. I could taste his cum all over my mouth as I continued to milk him for everything that I was worth. I knew some girls complained about the taste, but it tasted fine to me. His knees were shaking, and he probably would have collapsed if I hadn’t still been holding on to him. I let his penis slip out of my wet mouth, but Brian was far from done. He pulled me up only to tackle me onto the bed. The instant I was done his mouth and hands were everywhere, kissing my face and pulling off my shorts. He rotated his body so that we were in a 69 position with his cock dangling in my face. I couldn’t believe he was still hard after his last orgasm, but I reached up and took him back into my mouth at the same time he ripped my boxers off and sucked in my dick all in one swift motion. We had a great time pleasuring each other, and it was taking all of my self-control to hold off on cumming too soon. I felt Brian pull off of me for a second and then go back to work licking me up and down. I quickly found out that he had moistened one of his fingers and was rubbing circles around my hole. Ass play was new to me, and I wasn’t too sure about what he was doing. I was about to release his cock and protest when he slid his finger deep inside of me, and all I could do was moan. Shortly after, he added a second finger, which only heightened my pleasure. It became really hard (no pun intended) to focus on sucking him when he was doing such a good job on me. I felt his fingers probing deeper and deeper, and suddenly, he hit something inside me that started my orgasm almost immediately. My reaction must have sent off a similar reaction inside him because we were both screaming as we simultaneously pumped our cum into each other’s mouth. His body fell limp on top of mine and we both lay there for a few minutes, gasping for breath and feeling absolutely wonderful. Brian got off of me and came up to lay his head next to mine on the bed.
“You’ve got talent, kid. Stick with me and you’ll go places,” said Brian.
I kissed his lips and tasted the remains of my cum. Only a few minutes had passed since my first taste of cum and I could already tell that I was going to like it. I’m sure we looked absolutely ravaged and ridiculous. His pants and briefs were still down around his ankles since he never bothered to kick them off, and my shirt and socks were still on with my shorts somewhere on the floor. Brian’s watch went off and we both jumped up and started pulling our clothes on to get back downstairs.
We casually walked back into the laundry room as if we had never left and nothing had ever happened. Actually, we had made it back with one minute to spare.
“You don’t want to waste these precious few moments of our life do you?” I asked.
Brian knew exactly what I meant. He pulled me into a long kiss, only breaking contact when the machine buzzed at us. We transferred our clothes from the washers into the dryers and got those started. He looked at me innocently and said,
“Now what are we supposed to do in the hour that it takes for the clothes to dry?”
***
The last day at the community center wasn’t really a working day. Some of us stayed late on days earlier in the week and got everything finished up. Friday was a day for us all to be together one last time and relax. Since I hadn’t really made any close friends on the job, I didn’t have much of a reason to stay after saying goodbye to the few people that I had gotten to know.
On the way home, I stopped by a liquor store and picked up the “Evan Special,” a nice personal bottle of vodka meant for one person, and one person only. I had to do something to celebrate the end of work. I also stopped at a deli and picked up some lunch for myself. I would have eaten with Brian, but he was down at Columbia in class. Eating alone was never any fun, but you get used to it. While I was cleaning up, Robert called to ask if I wanted to go to a club tonight with him and Steve. I hadn’t even talked to them since the last time we went out together, so they didn’t know that Brian and I were dating. Brian and I didn’t have any plans for that evening, so I didn’t see the harm in going. I wasn’t going to pick up any girls, so I decided to have a little fun going out, drinking, and possibly dancing. There was no way I was going to let this spoil my evening. I was done with work, and soon, a new chapter of my life would be opening up to me. So why not celebrate by getting drunk? Not to mention, I was already feeling pretty loose. I kept drinking. By the time I had finished taking about half of the bottle of straight vodka, I remembered that I was supposed to take care of Erica’s apartment. I took her key off of the table and went upstairs. I looked around, checking to see if everything was as I remembered it. I laughed to myself at how silly the task was, but then I remembered her asking me to water her plants. Leave it to Erica to leave her watering can on the kitchen counter. I started to fill it up, but I wasn’t exactly paying attention, so it overflowed and spilled all over the sink and floor. Most of the water that I ended up pouring did not go to the plants. I put the pail back on the table, but I bumped one of the vases that she had in the kitchen. “Shit,” I said out loud. I found a dustpan and trash bag in the pantry and I swept the pieces into the bag. I was drunk though, so I wasn’t careful and I ended up cutting a little part of my finger. It hurt, but I’m sure the pain was dulled by the alcohol. I locked Erica’s apartment and headed back down to my own. The door was open and Brian was coming out of it.
“Evan, there you are! Where have you been? I knocked, but your door was unlocked and you weren’t in here.”
My words were slurred. “I was upstairs watering Erica’s apartment.” I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him. He almost instantly pulled away from me.
“Evan, you’re drunk.”
My eyes did a little dance as I tried to focus on him. “So?”
“I was just saying.” He looked at me closely for a second and said, “Why is there blood on your shirt?”
I followed his eyes to the spot where he was looking on my shirt. I must have wiped my hand on it unconsciously. I looked back at my hand and the cut was still openly bleeding. “Shit!” Brian said, “are you ok?”
The shock on his face was amusing. I started laughing at him and rested my head on his shoulder. “I cut myself on some glass, I’ll be fine.”
“Evan, you’re bleeding everywhere. Come on.”
He guided me back into the bathroom. He sat me down on the closed toilet seat and looked around in the medicine cabinets for something to bandage my wound. First he cleaned it and then sprayed with disinfectant. I think he expected me to flinch, but I was beyond feeling any pain.
“Fortunately the cut isn’t deep enough for you to need stitches.” He put a band-aid around my finger.
I giggled at his diagnosis. “And since when have you been a doctor?”
“Evan, it’s pretty clear that the cut isn’t deep. Did you even look at it when you got it?”
“Not really. I was too busy thinking about you.” I leaned in to kiss him.
He pushed me back. “Not now, Evan.”
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“You’re drunk.” He stood up and began to walk out of the bathroom.
I followed him out and into the living room. “Why is that such a big deal? We both drink.”
“Right, but I never drink and then try to sex you up. I also don’t get drunk the way that you do.”
My anger gave a little clarity to my thoughts. “And what’s that supposed to mean?”
“What it means is that when I drink, I’m around other people and it happens over an extended period of night. I don’t sit around in my apartment alone drinking hard liquor like some frat boy.”
“So you think I’m an alcoholic now?”
“I don’t think you’re an alcoholic, but I definitely think you have some issues with drinking. Or do you not recall the second time we met?”
And there it was. “I knew you were going to hold that over my head sooner or later.”
“Evan, this really isn’t the time to try to have this conversation. You’re drunk, we can talk about it tomorrow.”
I started behaving like a drunken brat. “No, I want to talk about this right now! Apparently you have a problem with me.”
“I don’t have a problem with you, I have a problem with what you’re doing to yourself.”
“It’s not as if I’m hurting anyone.”
“You cut yourself and it could have been much worse if you hadn’t gotten lucky and found me shortly after. Would you have even bandaged yourself?”
I acted like he had just made some sort of grand revelation that I had been going after for months. “Oh, I get it. You think I need you to get by. I didn’t survive on my own before you, I was just waiting for you to come and take care of me like a little child.”
“Evan, that’s not what I meant.”
“No, I think it is.” My words were cold and accusing. “I’m too helpless to take care of myself. What on Earth was I thinking? I shouldn’t have some fun and get a little drunk tonight. I should sit around and wait for my boyfriend to pull on my leash and drag me around.”
“I don’t keep you on a fucking leash, Evan. You know that.”
My voice raised. “Then why are you being so fucking annoying! I don’t need you breathing down my back like some damn counselor. Why don’t you just leave me the hell alone?”
Brian was screaming at this point. “Because I love you too damn much to let you hurt yourself like this, Noah! Don’t you understand that?”
Both of us were shocked by what he had said. I recovered first and started walking towards him, but in my drunken state, I didn’t notice the coffee table. Before I could even get to Brian, I tripped and fell over the table. Brian managed to catch me as I fell, but we both landed hard on the floor. And I was gone.
When I woke up, it was still dark out. My right knee stung a little and I had a little ringing in my head. I was on top of the covers in my boxers and Brian was sitting next to me on the bed. I turned towards him and noticed that his eyes were tired and red.
“Hey,” he said, “how are you feeling?”
“I’m fine. What happened?”
“You fell and your knee got bruised and cut. I caught you, but I didn’t know if you had bumped your head since you passed out.”
“No, my head is ok aside from a little ringing from the drinking. What time is it?”
“It’s about 3:15 or so.”
“Have you been up here the entire time?”I asked incredulously.
He nodded. “I was going to leave as soon as I made sure you were ok. If you’re not feeling too poorly, I guess I’ll head downstairs.”
“Brian,” I started, “I’m sorry for what I said. I didn’t mean to attack you like that, I know you were only trying to help, and I’m sure I wasn’t making things any easier.”
“I’m sorry, I said some things that I didn’t mean either. I just get worried when you drink like this. I care about you, Evan, I don’t want to see you hurt.”
I pulled myself upright, wincing at the pain in my knee. In a flash Brian was on full alert checking to see if anything was seriously wrong. I convinced him that besides some mild pain, I was fine.
“Erica is going to kill you when she gets back.”
“Why is that?” I asked.
“I went upstairs to check what had happened and to pick up a few pieces of glass that you missed, but the vase you broke was her grandmother’s favorite.”
“Shit.”
“It’ll be ok, we’ll just explain what happened.”
“Yea, but it probably wouldn’t have happened if I wasn’t drunk.”
“You don’t know that. You’re never the most graceful person even when you’re sober. You could have broken it regardless.” Brian laughed and I playfully cuffed his arm. He got up and started to leave.
“Brian?” He turned and looked at me. “About the last thing that you said before I fell, um, what did you mean?”
He walked back over to the side of the bed. “I’m sorry, Evan, the conversation was too much like one that I had with Noah before he left me.” He knelt beside me. “I guess I slipped back into that state of mind without realizing what I was saying.”
“Oh,” I said quietly. “You said, ‘I love you,’ but you called me Noah, so I figured you were talking about him.”
“But I wasn’t talking about him, I really don’t want you to get hurt. I’m sorry I yelled at you.” He reached over and put his hand on my unbruised knee. “I do love you, Evan, this just wasn’t the way I imagined tellilng you for the first time.”
My heart felt like it was going to burst. Tears began to form in the corners of my eyes. “I love you, too, Bri. It feels really soon to be saying all this, but I know it’s true. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.”
“Me either. It’s kinda scary isn’t it?”
“Come here,” I whispered.
I scooted over on the bed to make room for him. He climbed up and looked at me. He was beginning to cry as well. “Brian, I don’t want you to be mad at me. You’re probably right: I do need to take it easy on the drinking. If you want me to stop, I will.”
“Evan, I don’t own you. I can’t tell you what to do, where to go, I only want you to be safe. I get scared sometimes and I overreact.”
“I know, but I promise I’ll give you less to worry about. I love you.”
“I love you.”
He kissed me very gently on the lips. It was true, no one made me feel like Brian did. I had butterflies in my stomach whenever he kissed me. And every time he stared into my eyes. And every time he smiled. And every time he walked into the room. When he pulled back, he stroked the scar on my face and leaned in to kiss it. I loved it when he did that. It felt like he was trying to kiss the pain away.
“Don’t leave me,” I said.
His blue eyes met my brown ones, and he smiled. I slid off my boxers as he took off his clothes. We both went under the covers with him spooned against my back. I reached back and brought one of his hands around to my mouth. I kissed it and let it fall down towards my waist. We fell asleep like that, with him holding me and my body curled and melted against his.
Saturday had finally come. Brian and I were going to have our first official date. I wondered what real value the date had anymore. We had already done several date-like things and we had already told each other that we loved one another. Little did I know what surprises Brian would have in store.
That morning Brian left early saying that he shouldn’t stick around for long and that his absence would make the heart grow fonder. I told him he was full of shit, I knew he was planning something, but he just smiled at me and ran out.
I stayed awake in the bed, thinking about my relationship with Brian. As with any relationship, there were things that I would have liked to change, but they never bothered me for long. As mushy as it sounds, we had each other, and that was the important thing. And relationships are a lot of fun when they’re new. There’s a lot of touching and feeling and kissing. And there’s the excitement of learning new things about the other person everyday. Coming out of my relationship with Jane, Brian was absolutely perfect. Everything that Jane and I didn’t have was there with Brian. He made me so happy.
Before I got out of bed to shower, I remembered that it was July 19th, Jane’s 23rd birthday. I had already gotten her an amber necklace earlier that month before we broke up, but I wasn’t sure if she would accept something like that from me. I wanted her to have it, though. She was my friend and she meant a lot to me even if we weren’t still dating. I decided on calling her that morning to see if I could give it to her sometime that afternoon before my date with Brian at 9.
I dialed the number and a woman picked up. I didn’t recognize the voice, but I asked for Jane.
“Hello?” answered Jane.
“Hey, Jane, it’s Evan. Happy Birthday!”
“Oh, thanks, Evan. What are you up to?”
“Well, I have a present here for you and I was wondering when I could come and give it to you.”
“Why don’t you come over now? That is, if you’re not doing anything else.”
“Sure, I’ll be over soon.”
Normally I didn’t use my Jeep, but sometimes it was convenient, even in New York, to have your own car. I started it up and headed North towards Jane’s apartment on the East Side. Traffic wasn’t too bad, at least by New York standards, so I got there in good time. I knocked on the door and Jane greeted me with a hug.
“Evan, it’s so good to see you.”
I handed her the box with the necklace and said, “Happy birthday!”
She opened it and gasped. “Evan, this is beautiful, I can’t accept something like this.”
“But it’s perfect for you. It goes perfectly with your eyes. I saw it and I had to get it for you.”
“Evan, this is too much. I don’t deserve this, not after everything that I did.”
“You didn’t do anything wrong, of course you deserve this. Here let me help you.”
I moved around behind her and clasped the necklace around her neck. I remembered what it was like being this close to her, but I quickly thought of Brian, and if breaking up with Jane was what I had to do to get into Brian’s arms, then I definitely was not in a bad situation.
“Perfect,” I said once I saw the final picture. “It looks great.”
She hugged me again and said thank you. We were still in the doorway to her apartment, which was fine with me since I didn’t want to have to stay any longer than was necessary. I made some excuse about having a lunch date and told her that I would talk to her later.
“Evan?” she said.
“Yes?”
She stood there for a moment as if she was thinking very hard about some inner conflict, but she finally shook it away, smiled and said, “Nevermind.”
I turned and left her behind me.
The rest of my day was fairly boring. I went back to Erica’s apartment to check on it and see the damage that I had done the night before. Everything except for the one vase was in order. I only hoped that she wouldn’t castrate me for breaking it. I watched some weird documentary on sea horses, thumbed through some medical journals, and anxiously awaited my date with Brian.
After hours of waiting, 9 o’clock finally came. He had been very secretive about where we were going, so I wasn’t exactly sure of what I should wear. I wore a red short-sleeved button down shirt with a black tank top underneath and black pants. I knocked on his apartment door and was relieved to find that he was dressed in a similar fashion with khakis and a polo shirt.
“Ready to go?” I asked.
He gave me a crooked smile. “Yup.”
“You’re still not going to tell me where we’re going, are you?”
“Nope.”
We walked out onto the street, and I tried to hail a taxi. Brian took me by the arm and led me to the parking lot where his car was. We got in and he started driving North out of town.
“How am I supposed to know that you’re not kidnapping me?”
“You’re going to have to trust me,” Brian answered.
I reached over and took his hand in mine. “What if I already do?”
He had to watch the road, but there was definitely a smile on his face. “Then you have nothing to worry about.”
That ended my questioning about what we were doing. Whatever it was, he certainly went through a lot of trouble to set it up. About fifteen minutes after we left, he asked me,
“Did you take a nap today?”
“No,” was my reply.
“You might want to. You don’t want to get tired.”
I gave him an odd look but decided against protesting. I pushed my seat back and settled into as comfortable of a position as possible. I must have fallen asleep quickly because the next thing I remembered was Brian shaking me and telling me that we were there.
I stepped out of the car and into the grass. I looked around and discovered that we were in a field of grass, and Brian had pulled the car right into the middle of it. Now I was definitely confused.
“Alright, Bri, where are we?”
“We’re in a little park about an hour an a half upstate. I used to come here when I was an undergrad with my friends. Look up and you’ll see why I brought you here.”
I looked up at the sky, and it was fillled with all the beautiful stars that you never get to see in New York. Brian had chosen the perfect night; it was clear and warm.
“Brian, this is fantastic. I haven’t been able to see this many stars since I was a kid.”
He didn’t answer. Instead he opened the trunk of the car and pulled out a basket and a large blanket.
I raised my eyebrow. “A moonlight picnic in the middle of nowhere?”
“What can I say? I’m hopeless.”
“I don’t think I’d have it any other way, baby,” I said. I helped him get the rest of the things out of the trunk. There was a loaf of bread and a bottle of wine that couldn’t fit into the basket. I pulled out the wine and looked questioningly at Brian.
“Well, I didn’t originally plan on coming out here, but it was such a beautiful and clear night. I’ve got to drive, so there are some cokes in the back for me, but that wine is for you.”
“It’s ok. We can save it for when we can both drink it,” I said. “I’ll have coke, too.”
We unfolded the blanket and put it on some dry grass. Brian pulled out some plates and dishes from the basket. “I’m sorry that it has to be a cold meal,” he said. “I could pop some of this on the radiator and see what that does.”
“I think we can heat things up on our own,” I said as I gave him a kiss guaranteed to cause anyone within a 10 mile radius to blush. “I really do appreciate all the effort you put into this.”
Dinner consisted of some delicious cold pasta, sandwiches, salad, and some grapes and cherry tomatoes. I ended up feeding most of the fruit to Brian. Every once in a while, I would lean in to kiss him and share a grape or tomato. Brian’s intention was probably to spend a lot of time star gazing. We did that for about ten minutes and spent the rest of the time making out.
I sucked and nibbled on his neck, determined to pay him back for the hickeys he had left me. He sighed as he ran his fingers through my curly hair. In a barely audible voice he whispered, “Evan.”
I stopped kissing him and looked down at him. His eyes brought me an eerie sense of comfort in the moonlight. “I want you to make love to me,” he said.
“Bri, I don’t think I can do that. I’ve never made love to a man before. What if I mess up and hurt you?”
“I can talk you through it. I need you now, I need you inside of me. Please?”
That was a new feeling. No one had ever needed me before, at least not in the way that Brian seemed to need me then. I was willing to try anything for Brian, anything at all except causing him pain.
I had closed my eyes thinking about all of this. One look back into Brian’s eyes erased all of my doubts. I lowered my head and kissed him again, and this time I saw sparks. I knew this was right, it had to be right.
Brian sat up as I helped him pull off his shirt. He shivered a little at first in the night air, but I pulled him closer to me and kissed him. We had both kicked off our shoes and socks when we sat down on the blanket, so I helped him out of his pants next. I quickly took off my own clothes and dove for his dark gray briefs. I started to pull them down, but he stopped me.
“Wait, wait, I have to get something from my car,” he said.
I laughed as he ran over to the car, only wearing his underwear. Thankfully, this field was isolated. I couldn’t see street lamps or anything around us. He came back with a package of condoms and a tube of lubricant. He laid down under me, expecting me to resume my previous task, but I just looked at him.
“Something wrong?” Brian asked.
“Bri, you haven’t dated anyone since Noah right?”
“Right.”
“Have you had sex with anyone since then?”
“No.”
“And you’ve been tested since then?”
“Yes, and I’m negative,” he smiled knowing what I was getting at.
“Well, Jane and I never had sex, we dated for a year and a half, and I’ve been tested. So, I think it’s pretty safe to say that we won’t be needing these.” I picked up the box of condoms and threw them over my shoulder. Brian opened his arms and pulled me into his body.
I kissed him all over his chest and torso, slowly working my way back down between his legs. His hips lifted off the blanket, and with agonizing slowness, I pulled off his briefs. Having him there before me completely naked, exposed, vulnerable, it was the most incredible thing. There he was.
Heaven On Earth Ch. 05. There you are, a first time for everything.
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